Learning to Receive: The Missing Piece in Your Manifestation Practice

Melanie Mishler (: 00:00

Hello love and welcome back. Happy Thursday. I'm so glad you're here with me. And today we're going to be into and today we're going to be diving into something that many of us struggle with. Even the ones who have done the personal development work, the manifestation work, the healing, all the things. Today we're talking about receiving. Receiving an

all of its forms. can be love, compliments, support, money, help, even pleasure. yes, even includes sexual receiving too. Manifestation is ultimately about receiving. We can say that we want the life, the love, the abundance,

but if we just shut it down, if we deflect or if...

or if we don't even know how to actually let the good things in, then there's no space for them to land. There's no space for them to actually come in and be received by us. It's almost like throwing a cog in the wheel. We say we want more, but on some level we block it. We push it away. And I get it because that was me for many, years, decades, honestly. I spent many decades in this. And I get it.

And I get it because honestly, that was me for years, even decades, honestly, especially when it came to things like receiving support. So I want to tell you a little story that kind of sums this up.

Melanie Mishler (: 01:52

So let me tell you a little story that kind of sums this up and really shows how we, especially as women, have been trained to not receive, to do the opposite of what we want to be doing. Years ago, I was in the grocery store with one of my girlfriends and we were at the checker just checking out. Years ago, I was at the grocery store with one of my friends and we were checking out and in front of us was a young mom with two

tiny little twins. One of them was in the carrier, one of them was in her arms, and she was trying to juggle her purse, the baby, the groceries. She was clearly frazzled. And the bagger, the guy who was bagging her groceries, he said really nicely, like, ma'am, would you like some help out to your car? And guess what she said? She said, no, no, no, it's okay. I got it.

And I couldn't help myself. just, I really honestly couldn't help myself. I blurted out, she's a mom with two babies. You don't ask, you just offer help. Don't make it a question. And even then, I think she was a little embarrassed by me kind of blurting out, which was, I was totally out of line, I'm sure. Which I was totally out of line, but she

And even then, think honestly, she was a little embarrassed by my statement and I probably should have kept my mouth shut. But she said, no, no, honestly, really, I got it. And then she scrambled out of the store with herself and the babies. And when we got into the parking lot, after we checked out, we saw her still juggling everything herself. She was trying to get the babies in the car, the grocery cart, and it was in the heat, all the things. And it was so

painful to watch. friend.

Melanie Mishler (: 03:51

And love, cannot tell you how many times I have been that woman, frazzled, overwhelmed with support being offered, but I've still said, no, I'm good. I got this. Because somewhere along the line, we were taught that I got this is strength and that needing help or receiving help might not even be that we need it, but just receiving it is weakness.

And we're sold this this kind of shiny version of independence as women, Especially and I think this was kind of the downfall of modern feminism. It's the thing that says women can do it all. And here's the thing. Of course we can. That's a no brainer. We can run the household, build a business, raise the babies, balance the finances, hold down the relationship. We can do that all on our own. But love.

Here's the thing, just because you can do something doesn't mean you should. And let me say that again, because I think this needs to land inside your body. Just because you can do it all doesn't mean you should do it all. Let me give you an example. And this is something I've had to learn over the years. And I wanna give you a little example of how I've...

learned in my own life. And so I want to share a few personal examples of how I've learned to not do it all in my own life. And I'm going to start with our amazing house cleaner because she was just here on Monday. She is incredible, efficient. She's kind, trustworthy. She is really a huge part of our team and our life.

Melanie Mishler (: 05:46

Every time she comes, I'm so grateful for the support and for the fact that she's

Melanie Mishler (: 05:54

Every time she comes, every time she comes, I'm so grateful for the support. But I didn't always feel like that. I used to think, I can do this on my own. I can save the money and just, you know, take the time and clean my own house. Well, of course, well, of course, I'm capable of scrubbing my own toilets and deep cleaning my kitchen. Of course, I'm wildly capable of that. I did that for many, many years.

But here's the truth. She can do in four hours what would take me 10 or 12. And honestly, she does it better, more efficiently. It's her complete zone of genius. So instead of trying to prove I can do it all, I choose to receive support. I choose to receive help in this section of my life. Because receiving in this way, it creates space. It creates space for rest.

for creativity, for me to be stepping into the next level version of myself and my business. And this is where manifestation really starts to shift. Not when we hustle harder, but when we soften into receiving more. And I wanna give you another example. And this one is from my relationship, from love. Because when I first...

Melanie Mishler (: 07:25

And I want to give you another example from my life. This one is about receiving love and support. I want to give you another example of receiving from my personal life. And this is from my relationship with Andy. When we first met, I was deep into my strong independent women era. When we first met, I was really deep into my strong independent woman era. And I was a single mom.

I was a single mom, was a business owner, and I was doing all of those things on my own. And when we met, Andy shows up in a really masculine way, right? He is steady and generous and protective, and he was always wanting to offer help and support and to take care of things for me. He wanted to help take things off my plate. But honestly, I didn't know how to let this in, even though I said it's what I wanted.

So I was so used to doing things on my own that receiving his support, almost felt, I guess I can say like it almost felt threatening. Like it would cost me my independence. And I'll never forget about six months into dating him, we, this is about 15 years ago. He gave me an iPad as a gift because he thought it would help me with my business. And I was

And it was a very thoughtful, generous gift. But instead of being able to receive this with a, wow, thank you. My first thought honestly was this is way too much. Like I cannot accept this. And I kind of shut it down. And then another time, this was shortly after we met, he came over and he insisted on helping me with my yard work. It was something that I hated doing, something honestly I sucked at, but he wanted to come over and do

all my yard work for me. And I brushed him off. I told him I didn't need his help. didn't want him to do that for me. And I'll never forget what he said to me. He said, love, if you don't need anyone, if you can do it all on your own, then why am I even here? And that landed so hard in my body because the truth was

Melanie Mishler (: 09:49

I kept saying I wanted partnership. I said I was manifesting and calling in love and support and expansion. But what what? But unconsciously, I was pushing it all away. The moment it showed up, I would just shut it down and push it away. And that moment, that statement that Andy spoke to me, it was such a wake up call.

And honestly, back, I want to grab myself by the shoulders and just scream at myself, Melanie, what the fuck? Like, say yes to the support. Say yes to the love. Say yes to all the good things. Because here's the truth. Receiving isn't just about willingness. It's about openness. It definitely isn't weakness. It's the whole point of manifestation. Like, it is the crux. It's the what we're doing here.

right? Being able to receive the good things that we desire. it's about, and receiving is really about not shrinking when something beautiful arrives, not making it smaller, not clenching up to stay in control or to protect ourselves. It's about staying soft and open, even and especially when it feels vulnerable and scary. And love, this is not just with big things.

It's.

It's the way we struggle to receive compliments. Like someone said the other day,

Melanie Mishler (: 11:29

And this is something I still struggle with. The other day Andy said, your hair looks amazing. And instead of saying, thank you, I said, it's such a mess. I didn't even wash it. And he said, well, I like it messy. It's, it's sexy. I think why do we do that? Why do we make ourselves smaller in the exact moments we're being offered expansion? And I know this is a big one for women shutting down compliments. It's, it's something that

most women do. So I want you to really check in with your body on this one. Where in your life are you resisting receiving? Is it compliments, love, support, money, pleasure, maybe all of the above, maybe all of the above. But let's talk about pleasure for a second because this is one of my favorite topics.

I love talking about pleasure because so many of us women are disconnected from receiving it, especially in the bedroom. And here's the thing, this is foundational to manifestation. know it might not, I know that might seem odd, but here's why. Because if you can ask for what you desire and allow yourself to actually receive it, then you always keep the things you.

Melanie Mishler (: 12:59

Because if you can't ask for what you desire and then allow yourself to actually receive it, then you'll always keep the things you want at arm's length. Like this is really foundational to manifestation because it's all about asking for what we desire and allowing it in. And pleasure is a really, really great place to start with this. And one of my teachers, she used this analogy, which I love in,

Melanie Mishler (: 13:28

One of my teachers gave me this analogy, which I love. The analogy is it's like walking into a beautiful buffet with hundreds of different amazing dishes to choose from. But instead of just going around and selecting the things you love, you instead walk around and say, yeah, I don't want that. that shouldn't be here on this buffet. That looks disgusting. I don't want that and definitely don't want that either.

Instead of simply walking around and grabbing all the delicious things that you do want you reject the whole table and We do this all the time. We do it with people we do it with opportunities We do it with money. We do it with love. So today I want to invite you to look at your life with fresh eyes and Ask yourself. Where are you blocking the good? Where are you saying? I want more

but then at the same time, energetically pushing it away or energetically kind of clenching down and staying safe.

Melanie Mishler (: 14:40

Again, it can be letting someone support you, receiving a compliment without batting it away, leaning into intimacy and asking for what you actually want. Maybe it's raising your rates and getting paid what you deserve for your art or for your service. And that's the next one I want to talk about, receiving money. Because this one, again, I guess they're all really big for us women, but this one's really big for women.

And here's what most people miss. Receiving money, it's not about numbers. It's not about

Melanie Mishler (: 15:19

It's about energy. Money is an exchange of energy. It's an exchange of value. If someone's saying, see the impact that you've made in your life. I see the impact that you've made in my life or that the potential impact that you can make in my life. I feel the shift. This experience matters. And you're saying, I received that. I let it in. I trust that my work.

is worth compensation. I trust that my work is worthy of compensation. I trust that I'm making an impact. And let me give you a clear example.

And let me give you just a clear example. When I go to a beautiful, yummy, elevated restaurant, I'm not just paying for food. I'm paying for an experience. I'm receiving more than just what's on my plate. I'm receiving more than just what's on my plate. I'm receiving pleasure and nourishment and artistry and love.

This is about an energy exchange between the chef who created this and

Melanie Mishler (: 16:37

This is about an energy exchange between the chef and the restaurant who created this amazing experience. And in return, I'm offering money and appreciation and joy and praise and gratitude. And that's what a true exchange looks like.

Melanie Mishler (: 16:59

And it's the same thing when someone pays you for your coaching or your art or your creativity or your healing work or your care. They're not just buying a service. They're receiving a transformation. They're receiving time, beauty, support. And when you push away that money or when you undervalue yourself, you discount yourself to be more reasonable, you're not just blocking money.

You're cutting off the flow of energy. You're cutting off that energy exchange because receiving is part of this cycle.

Melanie Mishler (: 17:37

because receiving is really part of a bigger cycle. So if you are ready to expand, to manifest and to create more of what you want and create more of what you desire, then receiving cannot be optional. It's not something that you earn through over giving or proving, it's something that you allow. We allow it in softly, opening, openly,

So love, this week, would love to invite you, I want to, so love, so love, this week, I want to invite you to let receiving be your practice. Let it be small and sacred.

Melanie Mishler (: 18:27

Say simply, instead of pushing things away, simply say thank you and really let it land. Let someone.

Let someone hold the door for you. Allow yourself.

Let someone hold the door open for you. Allow yourself to rest. Let yourself be supported. Let yourself be loved and nurtured. You don't have to work harder or prove more to deserve it. You only have to let it in. And as you do,

Melanie Mishler (: 19:12

As you start letting receiving become your new normal, you're going to expand your capacity to welcome in even more. What we're doing is we're building our nervous system capacity to receive more abundance, more love, more pleasure, more beauty, more all of the good things. And then when the good things start coming your way, when they start flowing, I want you to simply try and say, yes, thank you more, please.

That's my little mantra that I love to use when something yummy comes my way. It's like, yes, thank you. More please.

Melanie Mishler (: 19:53

And it took me years and years to get there. So don't think this is going to happen overnight. You might still find yourself batting away that compliment or shutting down when

Melanie Mishler (: 20:09

or pushing away someone's offer to help or support you, but this is a practice. It's a practice of evolving into our highest state. It's a practice of evolving into our highest state because the more we learn to receive, actually the more we learn to give. Again, it's part of that cycle and it's really beautiful once you start to get in the flow. All right, love, if any part of this

If any part of this episode landed with you today, if you felt a little resonance or a little truth or an inner yes, then please take a moment to like, subscribe and share this episode with someone who you think needs it too. And if you're feeling that nudge to go deeper, to really supercharge your ability to receive love and money and support and everything your soul has been calling in, then I've got you. Because right now I have a few spots open in my private one-on-one mentor.

Right now I still have spots open in my private one-on-one program.

Right now I still have spots open in my private one-on-one program. This is where I walk with you together, hand in hand, just you and me.

Melanie Mishler (: 21:27

hand in hand, just you and me with full hand in hand, just you and me with full support. So if you're ready to stop circling your potential and finally, so if you're ready to stop circling around your potential and finally step into the version of you who just lets it all in, then this is for you. Then this is, then this is for you. You can find a link and more

You can find the link and more info in my show notes. You can find the link and more info in my show notes. And you can also find more info on my website, which is manifestwithmelanie.com because the next, because love the next chapter, it's about to be so good.

Melanie Mishler (: 22:20

because the next chapter, it's because love, because love the next chapter, it can be so very good. Until next time, keep.

Melanie Mishler (: 22:36

because the next chapter, can be so, it can be so good.

Melanie Mishler (: 22:49

Okay my love, until next time, keep manifesting an epic life.