The Power of Wanting More

[: 00:00:00

Are you ready? Let's go. Hello, my beautiful friend. Happy Thursday. Welcome back. Real quick, before we start today's episode, I need to give you a little heads up that my puppy Cooper is being super naughty, like really high maintenance, a little bit annoying. And so normally I would have him out of the room when I'm recording, but that's not going to work today.

. Today, we're going to talk [: 00:01:00

It comes out in a couple of weeks on November 18th. And I decided to name the book Women Who Want More instead of The Power of Wanting More because I wrote the book specifically for women. Because let's be honest, we have a completely different relationship with desire and ambition than men do. Think about it.

When men want more, they're often called ambitious, hardworking, driven, free. focused. Yet very often when women want more, we're labeled as greedy, ungrateful, unhappy, depressed, or hormonal, right? I mean, that's my favorite one. Society can always chalk up female restlessness to good old hormones. And let me tell you, I'm going through perimenopause right now.

out the hormones. And I know [: 00:02:00

I mean, come on, just even saying it right now just makes me, makes my head spin, but. I know it sounds crazy as an adult, but if you teach that to a child, then this fear of wanting more or of being more can really become this stifling and invisible upper limit problem that we don't even recognize is there.

ny women have given up their [: 00:03:00

And here's a well known secret friend, that fear, it's really fear of our power. It's fear of our gifts, it's fear of our calling and our full potential. And I've seen this pattern over and over. There's a little voice inside that's yearning for something different, something more, but constantly being suppressed.

And often what I see happen in women, especially women of my age, the Gen Xers, we got this bad. We've often pushed it down so far that we can't even recognize it anymore. And I talk about this in the first chapter of my book. book, which by the way, you can go download the first chapter for free on my website.

ad trained myself so well to [: 00:04:00

And this is really what we're diving into today. This is really the meat of today's episode is how do we reconnect with that voice of desire? And friend, you know, there's a difference between having a good life and having a life that's in alignment, that's soul aligned. And you know what I'm talking about.

This might sound woo woo or esoteric, but you can feel the difference in your bones. You can feel it in your cells, in the texture of your life. And I know many, many women who have built a good life. In fact, they built everything that they thought that they wanted. They have the career, the education, the family, the home, the cars, all the things.

great. You have a beautiful [: 00:05:00

Just be thankful. But here's the thing, friend, this is not about gratitude. It's not about being ungrateful because all those things, while they're wonderful, They don't make up for a desire or a longing that has been suppressed. And friend, let me tell you something important, that longing, it's not going away.

The longer you push it down, the more it will show up as friction in your life. It shows up as tension, as depression, anxiety, restlessness, because our souls have a way of getting our attention. When we're not living our truth, when we're playing small or we're settling for good enough, it shows up in our behaviors.

ve done All the shit to numb [: 00:06:00

And that's a really good thing because friend, if you have that little whisper inside your head that says, I made for more. I have a gift. I have a desire. There's something more I want to do. That voice is fucking right and it's time to listen to it. So let's talk about this power. How do we claim this power, this power of wanting more?

The first step is you have to acknowledge that voice. And I'll be honest, this can be really hard because here's what happens when we start listening to that voice. It's almost like excavating the foundation of a house that we already built. And let me tell you, that's complicated. I had a friend many years ago who bought this beautiful historic home, but they had to completely redo the foundation.

then they settled the house [: 00:07:00

And yeah, it's scary because sometimes what we desire isn't lined up with a life that we've created. Sometimes we have to take an honest, hard look and ask ourselves the deeper questions like is this relationship still serving me? Is this career still mine or did I inherit this from someone else's expectations?

The second crucial piece in this is getting out of your comfort zone. And trust me, as an introvert, I know this is hard. Right now, Andy's away in Michigan and I just want to say Snuggle in my cozy little nest with my puppy and have soup and read books and hide away from the world. That's my favorite thing to do, but here's what I've learned.

ay there too long, the walls [: 00:08:00

We're not meant to stay small. And here's the thing is that the longer we stay in our comfort zone without exploring the edges, without even dipping our toes out, the harder it becomes to get out of it. The thicker the walls get. It's almost like. Those prison walls get smaller and smaller until we can barely remember what it felt like to dream big.

And here's the thing about our comfort zone and those walls is they're not protecting us anymore. There actually comes a point where they suffocate our potential. They're muffling that voice inside that's telling you I'm made for more. I want more. So real quickly, let me explain how this desire for more will typically show up for women when we haven't been skilled at listening to ourselves.

isper. This is the voice I'm [: 00:09:00

A lot of my Gen X friends are in this right now. It's a moment when you realize that you've been living someone else's version of success. You did all the things right, But maybe it wasn't right for you. And then finally, the third one is that creative ache. And that's when you have this like achy desire to express yourself or to build something meaningful even when you can't name what it is.

And this is really important because oftentimes we don't even know what it is that we want to do. We don't even know what that more is. It's just kind of like this itch in your soul that you can't quite scratch. So, I'm curious, Brian, to Any of these resonate with you. For me, I had them all, but they might show up and just one way for you and friend, You know, I don't ever bullshit here.

I love to be real and [: 00:10:00

More, it's not about getting more stuff and I have to be really clear with that because very often people think it's about more stuff or achieving more goals. It's not that. It's about becoming more authentically you and finally giving yourself permission to live the life that's been waiting for you all along.

So, friend, this week I have two invitations for you. First one is I want you to start listening and really paying attention. Listen to that voice inside of you that's asking for more. Don't try and judge it. Don't try and fix it. Just listen. What's it telling you? What desires have you been pushing down?

nd they just keep constantly [: 00:11:00

Maybe it's having a conversation that you've been avoiding. Maybe it's signing up for a class you've always wanted to take, or even just opening your notebook and starting to journal. Whatever it is, just take a step that's outside your comfort zone. Because here's the truth. You were not born to stay small.

You were not born to silence your desires. It's unnatural. And that voice inside you, that longing, that urge, urging for more. It's not going away because it's not supposed to. It's your soul's GPS guiding you. It's calling you towards the life that you're meant to live. Okay, friend, if you are ready to dive deeper into this work, you know I've got you.

n also order it there. So if [: 00:12:00

And it's time to start listening to them. Let them come out and play. Okay my friend, until next week, be well and keep manifesting an epic fucking life.