From Safe Goals to Soul Goals: The Truth About Big Dreams

Melanie Mishler (: 00:25

Hello love and welcome back to Manifest with Melanie. As always, I'm so happy that you're here with me today. So next week is my birthday, July 2nd, which also happens to be the exact midpoint of the year. I don't know if you knew that was the exact midpoint. I think usually we're just thinking the end of June, the end of quarter two, but I love that my birthday falls on this date because

It's such a powerful moment to pause and reflect and kind of take stock of my year so far and where I'm headed and kind of the hiccups that have come and things like that. So not just in the obvious ways, like with the calendar goals, but also on a soul level. So every year I really love to spend my birthday alone, kind of doing this reflection practice

And next week, I'm actually doing a live event, not on my birthday, because I don't work on my birthday, but on the day before on July 1st, this process that I do every year. So it's really fun and it's a great way to reset your year if you're feeling frazzled or like life just life'd you and we're like, how is it already July?

So before then, I want to just have a real conversation about goals. Not the cute goals, not the new year's goals that we made and, you know, kind of fizzled by mid-March. Not the strategic ones that look good on a spreadsheet or sound impressive to our friends, but I'm talking about big goals, like the seemingly impossible ones. The ones that

stir something deep in your gut and might keep you up at night. And honestly, the ones that just scare the shit out of you. And to do that, I want to share a concept that I learned from one of my great teachers, Bob Proctor. I always love sharing my teachers with you. You've probably heard his name before. He was an incredible personal development and manifestation teacher who he recently actually passed away.

But I started studying with Bob about 17 years ago and his teachings changed my life. One of the things I liked most about him is how simple and practical he makes these big spiritual ideas or esoteric kind of woo-woo stuff. Because some of my mentors, like my favorite mentor, Neville Goddard, he's really deeply esoteric and philosophical. But Bob, he was like all business.

corporate suit, energy, no fluff. He had this very grounded, nobius way of teaching very, very woo-woo truth that made sense, especially to people who didn't identify as spiritual or who didn't really think of themselves as quote, manifestors. So anyway, I digress. If you don't know who he is, you should go check him out. But what I learned from Bob, it didn't just change how I set goals. It changed what I allow myself to want and desire.

And that shift that he invoked in me, it might also change something in you too. So what Bob taught me is that there are three types of goals. He called them A, B and C goals. And A goals are what you already know how to do. There's no stretch, there's no growth. It's just basically checking boxes, kind of like a to-do list.

And then B goals. This is what a lot of us said on New Year's, like when we make our New Year's resolution. they might feel like growth. might feel like progress, but they're realistic. And these can be things like lose 10 pounds, increase my revenue by 10%, spend more time with my family. but here's the thing. Those aren't goals.

their plans. They don't require you to become someone new. They don't stretch your soul or your identity. And I honestly used to live there. That's how I would make my goals.

and years ago when I wanted to increase my revenue. So then I went to, I'm going to make $40,000 this year and then $60,000 and then $100,000 and then $200,000. And yes, at the time it did feel very big, but looking back,

I can C- exactly what's happening now. Now that I have hindsight and now that I have that clarity, was doing is bumping up against my manifestation ceiling, something I teach in my course. It's that invisible line between what I think I can create and what I actually desire. And that's the B zone. It's where most people live. We're still in control. We're still calculating, still managing.

upper limit of what we feel is allowed or possible for us. But beyond that ceiling, there's a whole damn universe, like a universe full of soul level desires.

even think out loud because maybe you haven't even allowed yourself to go there to dream them. So, goals are very different. And this is where things get interesting and a little terrifying and a little electric. a C- goal is the kind of vision that lights you up.

and scares the shit out of you at the same time. Because here's the thing with C-Goals you don't know how you're gonna pull it off. You don't have a five step plan. You couldn't even make a plan if you tried. You can't reverse engineer the outcome with baby steps because it's that big.

It's so far outside your current identity, income, resources, and reality that it kind of makes your stomach flip when you go there, it makes your brain immediately start whispering, who the fuck do you think you are? Or that's impossible, or that's crazy. Here's some really great examples of people who held C-level goals. The Wright brothers.

Right? That was a C dream. Henry Ford. C dream.

Martin Luther King, he didn't stand up and say, I have a strategy. I have a goal. I have an idea. He had a dream. was a C level dream, seemingly impossible to everyone else who is currently like living in the world at that time. J.K. Rowling, another one. She was a single mom sitting in a cafe broke and she had a C dream. So you C- sea dreams, they come from vision.

They come from deep inside us. They don't come from logic. They come from desire, not spreadsheets. And Bob taught me something really, really important in regards to these C dreams. He said, when you're dreaming in this way, you have to suspend belief Because our logical mind, it's never going to co-sign on a dream that big.

it's just gonna immediately shut it down. It'll scream like you don't have what it takes, you have to be realistic. And let's be honest, your friends and family, they will likely do the same if you come out and tell them this big C level dream. They might call you crazy or tell you maybe it's not a good time due to the economy or another thing they do is they'll just like kind of smile and nod in disbelief. Have you ever had someone do that to you?

My mom does it all the time and it drives me crazy. So I generally don't share my big dreams until they're way in motion, like way, way advanced. Anyway,

But what happens when we share these and we don't suspend belief is that we'll start to shrink down the dream just enough to make it safer. And if you wait until it feels possible, then you've already downgraded your dream. You've already slid right back into B dream territories or B goal territories. And that's a trap. We think we're dreaming, but we're just still managing outcomes. We're still staying in control and

That's really what this is about, is about trying to control the outcomes instead of really diving in and just risking and trusting.

because sea dreams are about desire and a desire that really doesn't even make sense yet. Desire that scares you. It lives in a quantum field, not in your calendar, not on a due date. And if we wait to figure it out, we'll never go after it because C-Goals, they don't wait for certainty. They really require blind faith. ⁓

deep, deep knowing that comes in our cells and a faith to go after it. And the real work isn't believing it right away. It's the ability to suspend belief just long enough to let the dream kind of breathe and root and kind of burrow in to feel it and to hear the whisper inside like the yes.

even when everything inside you wants to run. Because once we get to that part in our body where we're like, ⁓ yes, this is something I really want, then it's really hard to tame it back down and to pretend we don't want something anymore. But sadly, most people, never allow themselves to go there because honestly, it's scary and there's no roadmap and it requires you to trust something that you can't prove, that you have no metrics for.

But the people that do go there, the people that really invest in their imagination and creating these huge dreams, the ones who choose a vision over fear, they change their entire life. And very often they change the lives of others too.

So allow yourself that space to really expand and really think about C level dreams.

So I'll give you a couple of examples from my personal life

of sea level goals. And both of them are kind of wild, illogical. They were illogical at the time and total C-Goals. The first one was our dream to live in Belize and create a boutique cabana resort there. So that dream, it started off as pure fantasy.

We didn't have a plan. We didn't even know where to begin.

We didn't know how we were going to do it. We didn't know even if it was possible to do it. ⁓ but we, we had this dream to split our life, to live between Belize and California so that we could be there for the winter and the summer, and then just come back and work a little bit, in our businesses. And then we had the dream to build this boutique cabana resort. And again, we had no idea how to do that, but the vision dropped in and once it landed,

It really kind of took root and it wouldn't leave us alone. We started dreaming it up. We started kind of playing with the ideas and

started to grow momentum. And then we were told the land that we needed for this little resort that we're building, that it would never be for sale. we owned one parcel and we needed the other two and we were told never, it's impossible. You can never buy it.

door slammed, like it felt totally impossible. And honestly, it was by logical standards. We should have just said like, ⁓ all right, let's go on to the next thing. but that's not what C dreams do. Cause we couldn't stop feeling

So I kept holding that vision. kept feeling it, letting it stay alive, even though everything around us was saying like, no, or this isn't going to work or you need like way more money, all kinds of things. And eventually the never for sale land, it came up for sale. and things began to kind of fall into place very, very magically. That's something that we could have never anticipated.

And that required us to suspend belief long enough for that dream to stay alive. And now here we are a few years later, building it. Like we're actually in the process. We're standing in the middle of that dream that felt so huge and so unreachable at one point.

And let me give you another one. My husband, Andy has recently had this huge dream, C dream of manifesting a sailboat and sailing around the world. And I'm not joking. He does not know how to sail. I get seasick. We don't.

own a boat, we don't even have a plan or timeline, but for him, this vision is really, really clear and he feels it in his body. He talks about it like his eyes light up, he gets so excited and he's already there energetically. And it's not really logical. It's not necessarily a smart goal. It's not something you'd write on a vision board at a networking event because we have no idea how this is going to come about, but it's real.

because C- dreams, they don't wait for certainty. They don't wait for plans. They arrive fully formed and they ask you to believe. They ask you to invest and to say yes before it makes sense. And I've seen it happen too many times now to doubt it. So when you hold a dream that big and you're willing to suspend belief, the how starts to reveal itself.

things start to organize themselves. happen, all kinds of stuff happens. So now once we're done building up the boutique cabana resort in Belize, I'm sure we will be off to Sail And I'll let you know how it goes because that one is his vision to hold since nothing sounds worse to me than being seasick for weeks on end. But I'm doing all kinds of things to try and...

figure out how to not be motion sickness. I've got these silly goggles. I got like the wristbands. I got all the things.

Okay love, so as a fellow woman doing this messy beautiful work, I want to ask you, have you let yourself dream a C goal yet? Dream a C level dream? Not a polished Pinterest perfect version. I mean the one that keeps whispering to you when you're tired of playing small. The one that feels way too big to be said out loud. What if you just let yourself want it? What if you gave it air and space to breathe?

Because that's where real manifestation begins. Not with plans, not with reasonable goals, but with desire. Desire is the crux of manifestation. You have to allow yourself to desire, to dream. So go ahead and name it. Let it shake you up. Let it stretch you out. Let it scare you a little. And then just suspend belief. Don't tell anyone about it. Just hold it for yourself. You don't have to believe it right now. You just have to stop.

talking yourself out of it enough to say yes, because love, that's the edge of where your next life begins. Okay, so if this episode opens something for you or maybe you heard a whisper of maybe, maybe I could dream a little bigger, then I want to invite you to my mid-year reset. It's happening next week on July 1st. Like I said, it's a free live experience to help you pause, reflect and reconnect with a vision that you actually want to be living.

Not the shoulds or the logical goals, but the real ones, the soul level ones. So it's happening soon. It's completely free. There's a link in show notes. You can save your spot, invite a friend and let's do this together. All right, love until next week, keep manifesting an epic life.